5 Ways to Tell the Truth about Ourselves

5 Ways to Tell the Truth about Ourselves
Telling your truth is scary. Many people are willing to go miles out of their way to avoid the truth. That way we avoid the pain that comes with telling the truth. Although denial can work in the short term to make things look all right, in the long term, denial keeps us from the possibility of change--it keeps us stuck in our problems, saps our energy and can leave us exhausted. Denial is a struggle and a struggle implies resistance. And the more we resist something, the more it usually fights back. What we resist persists. It takes courage to dig deep and allow ourselves to open up to the truth. And while telling the truth might hurt, it is also the first step in getting past the hurt. It opens the door to methods we can use to make effective, enduring changes to improve the quality of our lives.

1) Stop shaming and blaming.
Most people see self-evaluation as a negative process, but there is an alternative. We can learn to see shame or blame as excess baggage and just set them aside. We could acknowledge and even regret our mistakes and shortcomings while accepting ourselves completely. We can begin working with our list of weaknesses by celebrating them. The more successful people are, the more likely they are to be open to looking at their flaws. We can love and accept ourselves and still work really hard to change ourselves.

2) Forgive yourself.
One powerful way to move from shame to acceptance is to forgive ourselves. Before practicing new skills and new ways of being, it's wise to clean house. We don't need to beat ourselves up before we re-invent ourselves. We can be totally honest with ourselves and, at the same time, be gentle. While admitting our mistakes, we can treat ourselves with care. After all, everyone makes mistakes.

3) Let go of the past, but learn from it.
We can focus on what we have learned from our past, without getting caught up in repeating our mistakes. We can discover a way to move forward without feeling rotten about the past. We can change the way things are without having to be upset about the way things have been. The past is over. There is nothing you can do to change the past. It is also important for us to let go of who we were or what we did in the past if that is not what we strive to be in the future. This means we have to believe we can change--we can engage in new ways of being and doing. The past is useful in showing us things we do not want to repeat and in exploring lessons we have learned that can be helpful in creating change in the future.

4) Face your fears.
We all have them and they are responsible for holding us back. To identify our fears we need to pay attention and become an observer of ourselves. We should be paying attention to what we fixate on and what we ignore, how we make judgments about situations and how we interpret other's behavior, and the internal dialogue that is going on when the fear strikes. We need to get to know our mindset- especially patterns like learned pessimism or helplessness and other limiting or negative self statements. Mindset is based on our core beliefs. When we say we are afraid, underneath is a belief we have about ourselves- I am not skilled enough, good enough. etc., or a belief about the world--there is too much competition, people won't like what I have to offer, etc. When we can let go of fear we can release ourselves in powerful ways.

5) See the connection between strengths and limitations.
Most people place strengths and weaknesses in separate, unrelated categories. Another way to perceive them is as being closely related. Often the things about ourselves that we label as weaknesses are simply examples of taking our strengths too far. A person with a passion for organization can become obsessed with details and lose sight of overall goals. A person who listens well may forget to speak about his own thoughts and feelings. These are just a few examples. The point is to remember that our assets and liabilities may all be part of the same personal account.

4 things which can not recover

There are 4 things which we can not recover....

1. The STONE .... after the throw
2. The WORDS ... after it is said
3. The OCCASSION .... after the loss
4. The TIME ... after it is gone

HOW TO STAY YOUNG

HOW TO STAY YOUNG

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay 'them'

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down..

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it.. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER :
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

And if you don't send this to at least 8 people - who cares? But do share this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each day!!


Worry about nothing, pray about everything

5 Ways to Unlock Your Potential - when things can go wrong

Here are 5 things that can hold you back from your potential (and might be holding you back too).

1. Not admitting that things aren't working
If things are difficult and struggles are an everyday occurrence, something is terribly wrong. Struggle is different than challenge. Challenge can be invigorating -- struggle is draining. The first step in unlocking your potential is to take inventory of your life and consider what's not working. The symptoms of things not working will be lack of something (not enough time, money, energy, relationships, etc)

2. Not knowing your style and values
Understanding your unique blueprint of the world is critical if you're going to make the right decisions for you. Consider what's important to you about your life and match your values to your activities to get yourself in alignment with your dreams.

3. Saying "Yes" to too many things
What activities are taking up your time? What's on your plate right now? And more importantly, what needs to come off your plate? Are you trying to force yourself to complete a project, have a relationship, build a business that doesn't work? Who or what do you need to say "No" to today?

4. Not being comfortable not knowing
Who knows what will happen today, tomorrow, next week or next year for that matter? Spending time in an anxious state of not knowing is not helpful or productive in any way, and will only make you more fearful. Having a death grip on something that's not working is more detrimental than being in the "goo" of not knowing. All creation takes place in this state of not knowing because it's becoming known!

5. Not having faith and trust in the process
When you are on the path to reaching your potential, it sometimes feels like the world has gone badly awry. The constant shifting and changing (and people leaving and new ones appearing) can have a devastating effect if you try to manipulate every situation to your needs. During this time, it is important to examine what IS working and what you ARE working toward instead of looking back and noticing the destruction.

I know that for my client (and myself too) these are the things we constantly go through as we evolve. It does become easier to go through the roller coaster of life with a few rules (and some good friends) along the way.